The Pink Cloud

With the next court date looming in the following week, I find, as always, a crippling depression setting in. Which says a lot since I'm on an anti-depressant. What do you do to escape or deal with depression.  I can't say this gloomy, drizzly weather is of any help.  I've experienced depression all my life I just didn't know what it was when I was in my 20's and 30's.  I remember describing it as a heavy, gray cloud that would periodically descend over me.  A friend suggested I talk to a therapist, who told me to make the cloud pink.  The understanding of depression has come a long way since then thankfully.  I find that often I can "write" my way through it.  Somehow putting the words down on paper that describe what I'm feeling takes some of the energy out of them.

I think depression is linked to feelings of lack of control which gives way to a certain hopelessness.  Being in year 5 of this hideous divorce is taking it's toll.



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