Trollup, Bee, Men and Personal Happiness Post

Just talked to a friend in the Midwest who I've known since I was ten years old. We've stayed in contact off and on over the years. She's been struggling with a cheating husband over the last year. She really loves him and doesn't want to get divorced.

He says he still really loves her but doesn't understand why they "can't all just get along". Funny (not really) but that's exactly what doltoid said to me about the trollop he was "seeing" while still married to me. What is it with men? How dense can they get? Apparently, pretty darn dense.

She said the worst part is at night when her mind is filled with all the bad things that could happen. I told her I'd email a poem I had since grade school that got me through a lot of difficult times in my life. I've come to view it as sort of a code for living, surviving and happiness. It's called Desiderata by Max Ehrman. It was written in 1927. I told her my favorite line was "But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness." This is so, so true.

After reading through it a few times, I decided to share the poem with you. Hope it gives you some comfort when and if needed. It has me.

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Isn't that a remarkable piece of writing? She also told me she'd recently read two books that she felt were good but depressing. One was Little Bee:  A Novel, written by Chris Cleave. After listening to her and reading a few reviews of the book, I decided she needed a "better reading list" at this point in time. I'll share that list with you tomorrow. Hope this post finds all of you in a place of peace and happiness. Thank you for reading.